Mark
7:15
There are days and weeks when it seems you can speak your
testimony of God’s salvation for you and your changed life. Then after all
those days of speaking, action must occur. I thought I spoke and acted out my
faith regularly. A week then arrives on your doorstep that has you giving an
active testimony to God in your life, but it did not come because of positive
occurrences that happened to you. There are times when we believers in Christ
must get down in the muck of living in this world. Some weeks it is physically
getting into the muck and some weeks it is mentally and temperamentally. I believe
it is the latter kind of week that shows our mettle and it takes Christ’s
strength within us that enables us to be a light shining for Christ. It is when
we begin running with our great plans and are knocked back from them that our
reactions show to whom we really belong.
Consider this week. I had plans to meet with two of the teachers
who substituted for me; do the normal mom things during the week for my boys;
be the normal wife and prepare dinners, wash clothes, clean the house; then
work on the Sunday School lesson I am to teach this week, as well as do a few
in depth Bible studies for myself. What came at me with force was a week whose
agenda was thrown in the air and flung back into my face. First, the meeting
with the teachers occurred but required one to three more interactions. My plan
was for one meeting each. I ended up with five meetings. My plan was to get my
boys from school and take them to hockey practices and matches. What occurred
was my car breaking down… twice, going to buy a new battery, rushing back to
get boys, after getting said battery, calling for back up a second time in the
week when said car broke down again (thank you God for tow truck drivers with battery
chargers), taking and picking up said car from mechanic, scheduling to meet
with a person, then rescheduling, then going to their business (not there
because his car broke down), instead going to the class venue, going back to
the person’s business (still not there, other tire on his car went flat on the
same day!), contacting students to meet, rescheduling on the day because they
told me they couldn’t come after all, then, hearing our internet protection was
not protecting and spending 4+ hours trying to get that taken care of. Do not
get me wrong, I thank God for having a car, for having friends who will
substitute for me in my absence, for having computers and internets; however, there
are just days when they all fail, and on the same day, and your tension level
increases exponentially. That has been my week.
Now, the point to be made in all this is that these are
the weeks that not only try us, but they also prove to those who are watching
that what we say we are and who we actually are is the same. These are the days
and weeks in the trenches. How did I react? The first time, I let it roll off
my back. The second time, it also rolled off my back. The third and fourth
incidents also rolled off my back. By the time I had arrived at the fifth and sixth
bends in the road and in my schedule, my anxiety was increasing and I was not
as jovial. By the end of the sixth incident and my knight on a white stallion
arrived, I was not the most even-tempered person. My nerves were wearing and my
cool reserve was frayed. Fortunately, only one person, other than my loving
family, seemed to be aware of what was going on, the tow truck driver. By the
time he had arrived on the scene in his shining armor, I had reached the end of
my tether and God provided a way out before I said anything I would regret
later. I am not saying that my temper was not showing. I was probably a bit “short”
with my family and my frustration and anger was probably visible to their x-ray
vision (that is the vision that only a family has because they have seen you
most of their lives), but before I actually said anything that would make me
sorry, God had opened a door of reprieve.
Looking back on this week, even though I did not “blow my
top” and speak harshly to anyone, it was not the best week nor the worst week I
have had; yet, I feel guilty because of where my attitude was. You see, Christ
not only came to save me from my sins that are visible but also from my sins
that are only visible to Him and me. When Christ comes into a life, His Holy Spirit
comes into the person so that Christ’s person is available with which a person
may face and confront life. Instead of being irrational, with Christ’s Spirit in
us, we become calm and forgiving. Instead of being jealous of someone’s promotion,
Christ’s Spirit within us makes us joyful for the recognition the person
received in the form of a promotion. Christ’s life within the life of the
believer provides the correct way in which to respond to what we encounter in
this world. Jesus told the disciples and the Jews that it is not what is on the
outside of a man that makes him holy or unholy but what is on the inside (Mark 7:15).
It is the attitudes from which actions come that determine the whether the
action/reaction was sinful or good. We, as believers, have access to Christ’s
attitudes and way of approaching life. We have a choice of how we will face
each day, or, in my case, this week. We can choose to act in the way of our old
nature, in a sinful manner, or we can act the way the Lord would and allows us
to act through His indwelling Holy Spirit.
To say this week was easy would be a gross
misrepresentation. To say it was the hardest week of my life would also be a
gross misrepresentation. To say that it was a trying week, a week of setbacks,
is more accurate for me. I have not grown to be completely like Christ; none of
us will reach that point until we are in Christ’s presence in His kingdom. I
still have some growing to do is more accurate. Did I react as well as I could?
No. Do I recognize my inadequacies? Yes. Have I been able to go back, see where
God’s hand was in the week, and count the times He has blessed me during the
week? Upon reflection, I have reached that point. I hope that I do not have to
go through another week like this week. I also hope I have more control over my
attitudes in the future. Though no one saw them, Christ knew them. If I am
going to live as Paul states in Philippians 1:21a, “to live is Christ”, I must
allow Christ to not only affect whether I act out incorrectly, but I must let
Him take control of my attitudes and impulses. Through it all, I must remember:
1) I am loved by God, 2) I am forgiven by God, and 3) God is growing me to be
more like Christ. He has not given up on me. I must keep growing and being
willing to grow.